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Archive for December, 2011

Issue 22

There’s a lot we’re finding wrong with this sign. 1) We don’t like the ampersand (pedantic, we know). 2) That comma isn’t working for us (pernickety, yes, but it makes chic look like a noun and in that instance what, pray tell, is “shopping and chic”?). 3) How can you guarantee chic and cosmopolitan living 365 days of the year? How? Surely one day someone who ends up living on this posh housing estate is going to let the sophistication facade slip and accidentally wear mismatched socks or tragically decide purple is the new black two months too soon. We’re being mis-sold a dream. Trading Standards should get involved.

But forget all of those; it’s the last line that made us properly ranty. 4) Everyday one word is an adjective. It means commonplace, most generally. Every day two words is what you were after here, swanky property development agency, dammit.

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Issue 21

This was sent in by Andrew who used to sit next to Editor Clare in Physics. We weren’t very good at Physics, but we excelled in English. Now, Andrew queries in the email accompanying the photograph: “Is this too obvious a candidate? It was stuck on the wall of the photocopier room at work; some effort was made to correct it with a ballpoint pen a few years ago but I removed it last week in a fit of pique.” I say no, it’s not too obvious, and it’s good to see strong action was taken to remove the offending article. Confusing “of” with “off” is simply not acceptable in a professional organisation, even if you do purport it to be a “polite notice”. And what would the impolite version be? “Oi, pick your fucking files up you lazy twats”?

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